We live in a world when many have become lovers of themselves. We live in a time where man has become so consumed with self, that many are falling away from the gospel. I consider Jesus and all that He has sacrificed for us all, I think about the strips He received upon His back, I think of the pain He must have felt as nails were driven through His hands and feet, and I cringe at the mere thought of a crown of thorns being forced into his scalp, and having the taste of his blood mingled with sweat dripping down His face. And then I look at the behavior of man today. Man has become so self-centered, for their desires far surpass the needs of their neighbor, their friend, their families… They far surpass the will of God! The cries of those who are hurting are being silenced. Many hear, but don’t hear, for they refuse to take heed. For many are too consumed with self! Christ gave His life for us all, can we not give just a little of ourselves for our fellow man?

Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God (2 Timothy 3:3-4)

Now let’s examine this for a moment, for there are two sides to this. One side of it we’ll see a need and while able to help, refuse to do so. The other side of this is the person who constantly pulls on another without ever really attempting to stand on their own. This is when we come to see manipulation into play. The person who eagerly wants to help, becomes a crutch for the manipulator hence the helper becomes an enabler. In this you are no longer helping the individual, but instead hurting them. This person has become selfish, because they start to depend on you so much where you may not only become financially destitute, but you are physically, emotionally and spiritually drained as well. Many relationships are destroyed because of this type of behavior because you can find yourself becoming bitter towards someone, and we know bitterness is not a God feeling.

And that because of false brethren unawares brought in, who came in privily to spy out our liberty which we have in Christ Jesus, that they might bring us into bondage: (Galatians 2:4).

But as for the one who is able to help someone who is really in need, and you refuse them, it is the same as denying Christ. Matthew 25:42-46 says, “For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee? Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.” So we must do for people if we are able to, no matter what. If a person is being selfish, and allowing a manipulating spirit to use them, do your part and then move on, having faith that God will do the rest. But when you choose to be an aide to another, do it as a willing vessel, and not grudgingly. God is the judge, He knows all and sees all, including your heart. But if you are being manipulated, know still, God still sees that your heart is good, and the individual that is being manipulated by being a manipulator will be the one who will have to answer for their error, and not you.

Whoso stoppeth his ears at the cry of the poor, he also shall cry himself, but shall not be heard. (Proverbs 21:13).

Lord give us greater understanding of your Word…Teach us to walk in humility and to truly be helpers one to another. Lord I ask that you also give us greater discernment to know and understand the difference in being a helper to our brothers and sisters and becoming an enabler. Lord we thank you for your Word that leads us and guide us into pathways of righteousness, in Jesus name Amen!